32 ways of being an asshole to people

You only live once right? So what's stopping you from have a little fun and messin' with people while you're here on this earth?

Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors." Specify that your drive-through order is "TO-GO." If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up." Reply to everything someone says with "that's what you think." Practice making fax and modem noises. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc" them to your boss. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.

Drunk History

It's a fact. We love history. We love it so much that every time we come across the History Channel, it sucks us in like a blackhole, losing complete track of time, forgetting about that home repair project that's been nagging at us all week, or pissing off our wives or girlfriends to no end because their existence had slipped our mind. Another thing we love... getting drunk. And so it seems that the comedy geniuses at Funny or Die had rolled together both of these amazing pass times into one. Each video is pure comedy gold and informative to boot, starring the likes of Will Ferrell, John C. Reilly, Jack Black, Danny McBride, and even Don Cheadle. If you haven't seen these already, please watch and enjoy. This kind of history can't be found in books.

Need a costume idea?

Is time running out and you still don't have a costume put together for that party this weekend? Well, MUB has just the solution for you... Dicktowel! It's funny, functional, and sexual. You'll be the life of the party for sure with "Dicktowel!" No need for makeup, props or accessories. You just wrap it around your waist and you're good to go. Show up to that super awesome Halloween party, dance your dicktowel off, and you'll for sure hook up with that slutty nurse who has already slept with all your friends in the years past. Dicktowel! Order one now... duuuude.




Link: The Official "DickTowel" website

Editor's note: We at "Man Up, Bro!" cannot guarantee that dicktowel will make you cool, the life of the party, or get you laid by that slutty nurse. In fact, you probably will look like an idiot, everyone will laugh at you, and the slutty nurse just might kick you in the dicktowel for trying to approach her.

Marriage on the rocks? Here's a Lawyer for you.

The right divorce lawyer is hard to find. But when you "hate that 'vermin' you call a spouse like poison" and want to escape "the hellhole you call a marriage," divorce attorney Steven Miller is ready for your case.